Friday, December 06, 2013

I Cannot Be Smote

This is a line that Jessa says in the HBO series 'Girls.' She basically sleeps with an ex who has just gotten engaged to prove that she cannot be smote. In other words, he hasn't gotten over her and can't forget about her.

On Thanksgiving I got a text from an ex that I dated a year ago and very briefly. The breakup involved me finding out about a lie he told me. I don't put up with liars. However, I really liked him and we have stayed in touch a bit here and there--for example he was on my mass email about my dog dying this summer. That was probably our last contact.

This week I got my first Christmas cards. There is a very organized couple that I am friends with that always sends their cards first. However, they were tied this year with another ex from about a year ago (right after ex above). I haven't seen or spoken to him in months either, and when I've seen him I've been very cool yet civil. Cause he was also a big liar. Why did he even still have my address? I don't even have his phone number or email anymore and I never had his address.

Anyway, I'm just thinking WTF with these guys? And I came to the conclusion that I just cannot be smote.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Happy Thanksgiving

It's hard to believe it's already November and the holidays are here. And the year is almost over, for which I am thankful. I hope everyone has a great day today. I'm just hoping for as little drama as possible, and lots of leftovers.

Thursday, October 31, 2013

The "B" Project

So somehow I haven't written in over a month. I think because most of the month I spent on The "B" Project. After meeting this great guy I'll call "B" at the beach, we started emailing, and found out he was coming up to this area October 21 and wanted to see me and stay with me. I basically spent the entire month preparing and cleaning every closet and pile of clutter (there were many) in my house.

So "B" came up last week and we had the most wonderful visit. He liked my place--making The "B" Project worth it--and I took the day off work to spend with him. It was very fun and at the end we both seemed sad that he had to go back, but we didn't nail down details for the next visit. We have texted and emailed a bit, but it's pretty clear that once he goes back, he's involved in his life and doesn't really want to be in touch that much. So, according to one of my favorite movies, "he's just not that into me." Or he would be calling, emailing, texting, staying in touch. He mentioned maybe doing something NY Eve, but I am not holding my breath.

I'm disappointed to say the least. I thought the visit would solidify our budding relationship and make him want to be in touch and truly start something. But I guess not. The story of my life. So The "B" Project goes into the pile of wonderful yet unfulfilled memories of something that could have been great if only he'd given it half a chance.

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Beach Birthday--All That And More

Last week I was at the beach, after months of anticipation and dying to get away and forget about all the stress of the past year. So was the trip as good as it was cracked up to be? You bet, all that and more, despite my friend driving me crazy the whole time. She was having a feud with another girl in the house and kept trying to suck me in, but I wouldn't get drawn into the drama. I created my own fun, bonded with the other people in the house, laughed, joked around, drank too much, and ate too much. The weather was gorgeous and sunny every day, and I spent nearly all my time on the beach working on my tan, or floating around the pool, or in the Jacuzzi. It was awesome. Amazing.

Made even more amazing by a beautiful man who joined us unexpectedly in the middle of the week, and coincidentally the night before my birthday. He and I hit it off immediately, and he was the best birthday present I could have hoped for. Tall (6'5"!), dark, handsome, AND age appropriate. Smart, funny, passionate. We had many weird similar interests like bats and playing drums. Boy was I, and am I, smitten. Problem is, he lives in Norfolk, and while we exchanged contact info and he friended me on FB and we have emailed and texted a bit, I haven't heard from him since Saturday. I plan to give him through the weekend, then get in touch next week if I don't hear anything. I would like to see where this could go, and the worst he can say is it was just a summer fling and he's not interested in anything more, which is kind of what I'm thinking at this point anyway. It would be a damn shame, but I need to put it out there and see what he says.

I forgot how good it was to be away for a week, and to come home feeling rested and less stressed. I am still able to look back on the fabulous week when I am feeling stressed at work. I am sure it will fade with time, but the memories that I have of this week will last forever. Check out the view above from the eagles' nest/rooftop deck, where I watched the sunset and the stars each night.

Tuesday, September 03, 2013

Beach Bash for Birthday

I haven't had a proper vacation in way too long to count, so this year when friends approached me to go to Corolla with them for a beach week, I didn't hesitate. We are leaving in just a few short days. Coincidentally and happily I will be away for my birthday, which is getting way too close to a number I cannot even fathom. So I'm expecting lots of presents! Just kidding. What I am expecting is gorgeous weather, sun, sand, good food and drink, and plenty of fun with friends. I can't wait to get away, and I keep threatening to not come back. Check out this gorgeous house. I am counting down the days until I can be there!

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Half My Age Plus Seven

This is sort of a shout-out to LRJ, whose blog I read on a pretty regular basis. I enjoy the fact that while we lead very different lives and don't know each other at all, we sometimes face and write about similar themes that demonstrate that we are all not so different after all.

Case in point, one of LRJ's theories about dating has been that he can date someone half his age plus seven. When I first read that I thought it was ridiculous, I would never date someone that young. Well . . . guess who's ridiculous now? I just can't believe it. I met this guy back around Memorial Day through a mutual friend. I had no idea he was so young. I wasn't interested at first, but he pursued me so we kind of hung out but then all this drama ensued. Like LOTS of drama. Epic amounts. He didn't want to date, I backed off, ignored him, he kept coming back and more drama. I wouldn't put up with his crap. Yet somehow, through all the drama, we started connected on a real level, and I felt like I somehow really understood him. Then he decided he was interested.

So we decided this week that we are dating, despite the age difference. The big problem is he wants kids and I don't. And now I'm really too old to consider this. So one part of me thinks why bother, cause I have been here before and broken up with a few people over this issue. But the other part of me really likes him and wants to see how the whole thing plays out. Needless to say, it's gonna be an interesting summer...

Sunday, June 16, 2013

RIP Opie

I decided to put my 12-year-old dog Opie down this weekend. He's been sick with a tumor in his chest since January, and I tried everything to get him better: surgery, radiation, etc. I had to go to San Diego this past week for business, and he took a turn for the worse while I was away. His breathing was becoming very compromised, which wasn't fair and was so hard to watch. I worried he would have a crisis and suffer. I had decided I would have one last fun weekend with him and put him down Monday, but was concerned that I was being selfish and cruel by trying to get through the weekend. I even tried breathing as fast as he was to see what it was like, and it was pretty awful.

Friday, I went home early from work and we had fun--went to visit some people he really loves, had visitors at the house, and played with the neighbor's dog, which he loved. We were out playing till after dark. The next morning, however, he was up at 5:30 am just standing in the middle of my room. He was having a harder time lying down and getting comfortable due to the tumor pressing against organs. So he didn't seem to be able to lie down, and he seemed like he didn't know what to do.

I took him out, and he did have to go to the bathroom, but after that his rear legs started spasming, which had happened once before. I put him in the car and we went down to the dog park, and he was happy enough. I decided to just go home, but on the way he had another weird episode and almost threw up in the car, which is not normal. So I decided to go to the vet and at least see what they thought about his breathing.

The doctor was very nice and sympathetic and had something like that happen to his dog. He was worried that if I didn't put him down, and waited until Monday as I had originally planned, I would regret it. He gave me time to think and I decided I wouldn't have gone there if I didn't think it was the right thing to do. Also, if I had to wonder if I was being cruel, the chances were pretty good that I was.

Long story short, I decided to go ahead with it. There was one bad moment when the sedation started taking effect and he started to panic, but I pulled him into my lap and he relaxed. I got to hold him the whole time and it was very peaceful. I actually felt relief when his erratic breathing ceased, it was so hard to watch and it had to have been so hard on him.

Putting the pet that you love down totally sucks and is such a hard decision, but it is a blessing to be able to end the suffering and let them die peacefully. I only wish people didn't have to suffer so much until the very end.

RIP my little Opie dog, you were the most smart, intense, engaging, obstinate, willful, and funny dog. You had a personality that was larger than life, and your presence will be felt for a long time. I will miss you and never forget you, and my other dog is despondent at your absence.

Friday, May 31, 2013

A Week of Carnage

I have had some bad weeks before, but this one has to take the cake. Bloody bodies strewn everywhere. Here's a snapshot:

1. Went out with a friend of an ex, stupid idea I know. Though he said he had cleared it with the ex and he was cool with it, the guy wound up having a complete meltdown and freaking out and confessing everything to the ex. Carnage there was mine: thrown under the bus.

2. Guy friend who wants to be more than friends invited me to a BBQ last weekend but cancelled due unforeseen circumstances. He had a bad day on Thursday and took it out on me with a passive aggressive text rant about how I wouldn't make time for him when I legitimately have no time this weekend, though I did invite him over Sunday for a BBQ and somehow he missed it, and hello, you're the one who didn't come through last weekend. I don't owe you any of my time just cause you want it. Grow the fuck up. Guess what? We are done before we started now. Carnage: his and quite frankly his own stupid fault.

3. I let an employee go at work that I thought wasn't performing up to where she needed to be. She was still on probation and only 2 months in, but I had been frustrated with her and tried to counsel her, but she didn't have a clue that she was in trouble. This was part of the problem, just clueless. She took it really hard, said she was devastated, financially it's gonna be hard, she really loved the job, etc. etc. It was just brutal. Made me really regret my decision but she'd been driving me crazy for 2 months and I just didn't feel it was working out. Carnage on both ends.

So while I might not be Helen of Troy, I think I came as close as I ever will this week.

Sunday, May 19, 2013

The Wisdom of Seeing Exes

Recently my first serious boyfriend--who I haven't seen in 15 years--contacted me to check in. He pops up about every 5 years via email to say hello, and this time he wanted to get together. I was excited and scared at the same time. Would he look the same? Would I be attracted to him and vice versa? Not that it truly mattered as he is now married, but I had to wonder.

Back when we were together, I was gaga over him--he was tall, blond, built. I wondered at the time what in the world he saw in me cause I had not really dated a lot and certainly never thought I would snag someone so good looking. I actually went to my 5-year high school reunion just to flaunt him in front of all the people I hated, and loved every minute of that.

So my curiosity got the best of me and I agreed to meet for a drink last night. Honestly, if I had seen him on the street I would never have recognized him. He had said he looked roughly the same--we joked via email that we both were a little older, had a few more wrinkles, and carried a bit more weight. But he had gained more than a little weight, and was virtually bald though he had said he "kept his hair really short."

The question is, does he truly think he looks the same? Are we all deluding ourselves as we get older that we look virtually the same? Wow, it has been an eye-opening weekend. Should I have just skipped the meeting and kept the fantasy of him alive in my head? Makes me want to pull out all my old photos of him when I thought he looked like a Nordic God and reburn those memories back into my brain.

Tuesday, May 07, 2013

I Love Telemarketers

I have a secret admirer, named Unavailable. Unavailable calls me at least once a day, from different numbers. Oh they're so sly, trying to trick me and keep me from guessing who they might be. I think about calling them back, but then think, no, if they can't bother to leave a message, I can't bother to call back. Why won't you show yourself to me? Oh, if only caller ID showed who you really were, perhaps I would actually pick up one day. (Moral for charities: Let people know you are calling and perhaps you will get a better response.)

Monday, May 06, 2013

Relaxed After the Weekend

This morning when I went to work, I felt like I'd really had a weekend and refreshed after a long week last week that ended with an interview where I was:

1. Given the wrong address. The right address was all the way across DC. Needless to say, I didn't go.

2. Given the wrong time. Apparently the company didn't have me on the books until next week! Check out the apology flowers, which make me think I should interview after all.

I can't figure out what I did to feel so refreshed, my weekend wasn't much different than any other, but it sure was great to walk into work starting from a good vantage point of not being too stressed out.

Monday, April 29, 2013

Senseless, Sad Part of the Weekend

Saturday night people were looking for a lost dog when I went out to take my dogs for the last time. The girl said she lived nearby and had taken the dog's collar off as she went to enter her building. My question: Why the hell would you do that? The area is so busy, if you don't want a collar on, why not wait until you are in your apartment?

The next day the husband was driving around passing out flyers to dog people, very smart. I told him to email it to me as I knew a lot of dog people and I would help get the word out. So I spent the morning doing that when I really didn't have the time, but I knew time was of the essence cause this dog was a puppy and didn't even know her name.

That afternoon I had my writing group, and as I was driving home on the highway, there was a dead something on the side of the road that was black and tan--the dog was black and tan. I couldn't imagine what else it could be, as it couldn't be a raccoon or whatever and I just knew it was the dog. It was gruesome and so very awful. Now that picture is in my head...

I didn't know what to do, but felt I had to call the husband, so I told him what I saw and where. I told him I wasn't sure, but that he should go look and if he needed help to call the police rather than getting out of the car. Why did it have to be me who found the dead dog? What a terrible coincidence.

I wanted to know the outcome but I didn't ask him to let me know cause I felt kind of weird and morbid about it, but he did email me later that night that it was his indeed dog. So sad and negligent. I am just crushed as this was completely the owner's fault. I know dogs get away from people and that has happened to everyone, but to intentionally take off a collar for no reason when you live right off the highway? I just don't know how people are so stupid with their pets.

The Good Part of the Weekend

I've clearly been stressed, so this weekend I planned some fun things. Friday night I had a much-needed massage, which was delightful. Saturday I went to see my former neighbor who had moved to a single family house with a yard. My dogs came with me. Here's a recap of Saturday's adventures:

1. Two bottles of wine consumed mid-afternoon. How can a day be better than that? And the weather was to die for!

2. Dead animal carcass discovered and removed by my dog. SOOOOO gross!

3. Psycho former owner visit, telling the new owners about "hidden treasure" safe in the floor of laundry room and offering to take us on a tour to the former dog kennels. Adorable neighbors (see below) said she was a drunk.

4. Two adorable gay men next door. So fabulous! With a jack russell female dog named "Jackie O." I think that pretty much says it all.

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Les Jeux Sont Faits

So a week and a half ago I decided to try radiation with my dog, as I felt he was getting much worse. Turns out, I was right, as the tumor had grown roughly 30%. Unfortunately, he had a bad reaction to what they give to put him under and his blood pressure was all over the place. They talked about possible kidney damage, but luckily that wasn't the case. I went for the 2nd radiation session this week, but the 1st hadn't done any good and the vet felt that the kind of palliative radiation I wanted to do wouldn't really help, so I decided not to do the 2nd. I am kind of out of options unless I want to do terrible chemo drugs. So I'm doing holistic stuff and that's it. The problem with holistic is it takes time to work, and I don't have time. They are saying 2-3 months at this point. It is just agonizing. My holistic vet is hopeful, but really, what else is she going to say? So time will tell, and I am just trying to spend as much time with my dog as possible and make his final months as good as they can be. Ultimately, I am at peace with my decision, as I feel I have tried everything and nothing is working, but it is so sad and depressing at the same time.

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Where Does the Pain Go?

It's been a pretty rough week here again. Three people I know had to put their dogs down for various reasons. And a newly reconnected friend lost his wife this week, and it might have been the day I reached out to friend him on Facebook. A bunch of high school friends have connected recently, and I purposely didn't connect with him at first cause I found him annoying back in the day. But the more I thought about it the worse I felt dissing him, so I sent a friend request. And now I'm glad I did.

On my own dog front, I took my dog for radiation this week, and found out his tumor had grown 30% in three weeks. Not good. I started radiation because I felt he was really getting worse, and I was right. Unfortunately he had a bad reaction to the anesthesia that they used. His blood pressure dropped then spiked and there was a danger that he could have kidney damage. Luckily, that was not the case. But the bottom line here is that before putting him under again we need to assess whether the first dose did enough good to make the risk of anesthesia worth it or not. If not, I'm kind of at the end of the line here, and all that's left are terrible chemo drugs which I won't do, or holistic, which I am already incorporating. It's pretty hard coming to a place where potentially there is not much left to do.

Watching all the loss around me this week makes me realize that my turn is coming soon. I have been there before, and I will get through it, but it's not a good place to be. I always wonder how all of us deal with the loss, sadness, and pain that we are faced with every day. It's so hard to soldier on sometimes like nothing is wrong, but that is what is expected, and we have to find a way to live our lives in the face of so much adversity.

Saturday, April 06, 2013

Good for Everyone Else (Or, Feeling Sorry for Myself)

So tonight my best friend texts me out of the blue that she bought an Audi. WTF? I didn't even know she was in the market for a car, and furthermore, how can she afford an Audi? (Though admittedly she has a thing for expensive cars and once had a Beemer, so I guess I shouldn't be that surprised.) Me, I drive a 15-year-old Honda Civic that I can't seem to give up, nor can I afford to.

Fast forward to walking my dogs and running into my neighbor H., whom various people have been gunning for me to get together with, just by virtue of the fact that we are both attractive, approximately the same age, and single. However, H. and I have been at many social functions together, and while he pays attention to me and is very friendly, he has never once asked for my number or for a date or anything. So I figured he just wasn't into me, and apparently I was correct as I saw him walking arm-in-arm tonight with a petite blond with long hair. I am an average build brunette with shoulder-length hair. I thought to myself, huh, that explains a lot.

Anyway, these great things in life seem to be happening all around me, and I am truly happy for my friend and her new car. But when is it my turn? Instead I have an ancient car, a broken budget, a dying dog, a job I hate, and no prospects for dating. I know I have made the choices that got me where I am, but sometimes I just have to wonder why. And what I am going to do about it.

Thursday, April 04, 2013

Layer Up

This crazy cold spring is making me crazy. I'm still bundling up with complete winter regalia in the morning to walk the dogs--heavy coat, hat, gloves. I'm so tired of it. I just get so cold, that I always have to prepare myself with a layer more than most people. If people have no coat, I need a light fleece. If people are in fleece, I'm in mid-weight; they're in mid-weight I'm in my Michelin man coat. Getting so sick of it, spring please show up soon!

Wednesday, April 03, 2013

Why I Hate Decisions Part 2

So my new employee started Monday. I picked her over another candidate cause she had a lot of experience and came very highly recommended. I am already ready to get rid of her. She took like 4 hours today to do something that should have taken 2 hours MAX. It just wasn't that hard. This job is very busy and stressful and a lot of work. There is no way she is going to succeed or last if she doesn't speed her slow ass up. I don't know whether to give her this feedback so early on or give her time since this was her first "big" assignment. But seriously, it was like copying and pasting and I could have done it in under an hour. I wish I had chosen the younger candidate at this point. This is the problem with decisions, the grass is always greener and I always wish I had made the other decision. It sucks.

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Why I Hate Decisions

So since my last post, I made the decision to:

1. Hire the person with more experience. I just don't have the time or energy to take on another newbie employee project. I need someone to jump in with both feet and take the burden off me after doing their job for almost 4 months. The person starts Monday, so fingers crossed.

2. Do surgery and holistic. The surgery, after agonizing about the decision, ultimately didn't work. The tumor was too invasive to remove. All that money down the drain and my poor dog having to recover only to decline in a few months. I could have put him down on the table, but I just couldn't do it. I should have done radiation, less invasive and less money. But also would buy less time. I did surgery cause I was just greedy--wanted him to stay around for longer. He is recovering well, but it all just sucks and I regret not going with my gut instinct not to do it. A decision that backfired.

3. Not go into business. It would be SOOO much work. I do enough fucking work between my job and volunteer stuff, I just don't have the energy for more, even if it will make me money. I need to have more fun.

Friday, March 15, 2013


I have had to make some big decisions lately, and I am really struggling with them. I can't seem to make a decision when there is no clear-cut choice. I have always been able to see too many sides of the story, too many "what ifs." It drives me crazy. And my boss--got called out for this on my review. So there must be something to it. The decisions I've had to make recently:

1. Which new employee to hire? Two great candidates, just one slot. Both very different. I did finally make a decision but was I happy with it? No. I was glad to make a decision, and hopefully I will be happy once she starts, but bummer about the other person.

2. What to do with my dog? I have scheduled surgery, and also have a holistic vet coming. There are too many tough choices, and I don't want to do anything that will make the rest of my dog's life worse.

3. Should I join a colleague in business? It's kind of one of those pyramid things but with a reputable company and chance for real profit. There's not much risk to joining, but it would take a lot of effort. Do I have the energy though I need the money?

Why do I have such a hard time making decisions? For me, the grass has always been greener, and that's a tough way to look at the world.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

You Can't Take It With You

A good friend of mine is battling cancer and while she lives far away, I have tried to stay in touch by calling, sending cards, putting notes on Facebook, etc. She is also a real dog lover and knows the story of my recent doggie woes. Out of the blue I got a card from her thanking me for all the support, and a rather large check to help with my dog's treatment. I was floored. This person who is herself struggling to get well is thinking of me and my dog and trying to help. I burst into tears when I saw the check, and promptly called her, causing her to burst into tears. I told her that was the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. She replied "Well, you can't take it with you."

Monday, February 25, 2013

Say Cheese

The oddest thing happened last night when walking my dogs through Shirlington. This family stopped me and asked if they could take pictures with my dogs. There was a guy, 2 women, and 2 children--one in a stroller. Luckily my dogs are very social and love people and kids, cause these strangers were asking me to get the dogs to cuddle up to their kid, to sit with them. They were having a ball and snapping away on their camera phone, laughing. They even asked me to pose for a photo. While all this was going on, another couple approached and asked if they could pet my dogs. The husband of the first group said I should charge them. The first group barely spoke English, so I really couldn't get any sense of why they were doing this, and why it was so fun. Sometimes life is just too weird to figure out. So now my dogs are going to be popular in some unknown country, probably somewhere on YouTube. I should have charged them all!

Sunday, February 17, 2013


In my recent commentary on dating (see January 16), I made a comment about a certain married guy who was "interested" in me. It turns out that he called one of our mutual friends on Valentine's Day, yet I didn't hear anything. Interesting. So who knows what kind of game he is playing--is he adding to his entourage? I mentioned the call to him, and he claimed he was just "being nice." Uh . . . yeah.

Saturday, February 09, 2013

Going Through the Big C

And yes I mean cancer . . . not me personally or my family, thank God. But my dog. Like family. He has two large masses in his lung. I had one $200 consultation with no definitive results, and it will cost another $600 in testing to find out what exactly it is, so I know what the treatment options are. Since my dog is 12 with a heart murmur, I don't plan to do surgery or anything too crazy, but there seem to be some drugs that can be administered at home that will potentially help shrink the tumors and give us more time. Cause unfortunately as much effort as people put in to trying to save pets with cancer, it never really seems to help . . . all you can do is buy a little time.

This has been quite a surprise cause he's still acting peppy and normal and you would never know he is sick. But I know it's just a matter of time before things get worse and that is a terrible feeling. Plus he's too young, it just is so unfair. At least when my other dog got really sick, she was 13-14 and really frail so my decision not to do anything invasive was a no-brainer, but this is less clear-cut, and it is hard to fight the instinct to do whatever it takes and drain my entire savings. So I'm just taking it day by day, but this has been a terrible blow during an already difficult week . . .

Monday, February 04, 2013

My Day in Reality

Per my little tag line above, this blog is about the good, the bad, and the ugly. Here are those truths today:

The good - I actually had a job interview and it went well. I heard from the recruiter that I will be called back next week for round 2.

The bad - I found out from the vet that my 12-year-old dog with a heart murmur has 2 large masses in his left lung. As the doctor said, "This is going to get bad soon." Thanks for the insight and the $200+ bill.

The ugly - A supposed good friend of mine who has been randomly avoiding me had invited me to a Superbowl party last night. The host has been sick, so the friend uninvited me, claiming the host just wanted to keep it small. In truth, it seems that was not the case, as reported by another friend who went to the party. He said if he knew I was uninvited he would have invited me. No worries, cause I had 2 other parties to go to including an invitation from an ex who has been texting me a lot lately ...

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Double Blind Dating

So my friend who is dating the guy that I now covet invited me over to his place this past weekend to be sort of a double date for someone visiting from England. It was a fun evening of playing pool, dinner, drinks, and a fun board game called Sequence, though I lost miserably. The guy from England turned out to be much older, and not at all attractive. He was nice and funny, and of course the accent was to die for, but he is not someone I would consider dating. He, however, took quite a fancy to me and wants to see me this weekend before he goes home. Luckily I think I am busy, but why couldn't he be 15 years younger and hot like his friend?

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Thou Shalt Not Covet

I went to dinner the other night with a good friend who hasn't dated in a while. She told me she met someone and while she didn't think it would lead to a serious relationship, she liked this guy and was having fun. It was good to hear that she was back out there and enjoying it.

Our outings typically end early, so I was surprised when she wanted to text said new guy and see if he wanted to come join us for a drink around 10 pm. It was a Thursday night so I thought why not stay out late cause tomorrow is Friday.

This guy walks in, he's a good 10 years younger than her and closer to my age. Very good looking, well-built, funny. We hit it off and he was asking me questions and telling jokes like we were on a date. At one point he took my hand and was telling silly fortunes. There was music playing, and while he danced with her first, he also danced with me. The end of the night came and they started smooching goodbye so I made my way to the bathroom and realized "I really like this guy!" But from the way my friend was acting all night, so does she.

So now I'm caught in this terrible crush on my friend's date. I am doing my best to realize it's not a good situation and move on, but I do admit to looking at his LinkedIn profile in the hopes that he would see that I did. I know where he hangs out so I could do something really stupid, but I won't cause I don't want to do anything to jeapardize my friendship. But what a total bummer!

In the meantime, there was this other guy at the bar that I recognized, he is a neighbor. He kept making eyes at me and asked me to dance when there was no music playing. He was pretty drunk and slurring his words, and at the end of the night he said "It was good to see you even though we didn't make out." Really?

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

13 Days to Crash and Burn (Or, Sad But True Dating Truths)

So much for NY Eve opportunities, it took precisely 13 days for things to end with the new guy. I don't know what is going on with dating these days except here are the top 5 truths I've unfortunately uncovered recently:

1. Everyone is lying. A lot. Three guys I broke up with last year were lying about other women, thinking I wouldn't find out. Guys, we're not stupid. You make stupid excuses, hide it poorly, and we're not supposed to know? Come on.

2. Dating doesn't exist anymore. Guys don't want to date or have committed relationships. In the DC area, where the ratio of women to men is ridiculous, guys have their pick of a lot of girls. And they go with that. And try to sleep with as many of them as possible with no commitment afterwards.

3. Real communication doesn't exist either. Guys think it's ok to ask you out or "talk" to you via text and never pick up the phone. Really? I used to refuse to go out via text request, but I realized if I do that, then I'll never have any dates.

4. Marriage is on the rocks. Of the current guys in my "flirtation rotation," two are married. One of them has approached me seriously about taking things further, claiming an "open marriage." WTF?

5. Age doesn't matter anymore. In the past few months, I have been out with a 23-year-old and a 60-year-old. And they were both equally as immature and didn't last.

Anyway, that's my assessment of what's going on out there. Anyone have similar experiences? Think I'm out of my mind?

Tuesday, January 08, 2013

A New Year, New Opportunities

I can't believe it's been over two months since I last posted. Things have been really crazy with work, holidays, etc. New Year's Eve was super-fun. I go to the same party every year with a group of friends. There's live music, food, drink, all for a really good price. I took a date to last year's party, and it was a disaster for a variety of reasons and the evening ended badly, as did the relationship a couple of weeks later. Ironically this guy who ruined my night last year was texting me this year to meet him at a party. Really??

So this year I went to the party by myself, and lo and behold I met someone there, much to my surprise. I guess there's a first for everything. Meeting a new guy on NY Eve, what could be better? He actually didn't talk with me much and didn't dance with me until I was about to leave with friends to go to another bar. He wanted to come so we told him where we were going and he actually managed to find us, and got my number. We went out the next day and have been out 3 times since.

I don't want to get my hopes up, but somehow this year I actually did feel different on New Year's Day, like things I was doing last year I couldn't continue to do this year. I don't know if it had to do with the guy specifically, but there was definitely some page that turned that night, and made it feel like this new year had some real possibilities. It was amazing to wake up and feel it is a whole new ball game this year. And that is a really great feeling.